Dont just talk to yourself- argue too.

A strange little habbit of mine is talking to myself, now the best of us do it at some point, but mine seems to have developed in to argueing with myself, so when do you know you have crossed the line of normal self babble to worrying conversations that turn into a row, and just with yourself?

I found myself playing out an argument in my head, which in turn became vocal, maybe more than i had thought. heres me, walking happily down the road planning my perfect row with myself thinking i was the only one around. My row was to be with my ex, and as i decided against setting his car on fire, i thought a good old bust up would get it out of my system. so me being a perfectionist at the best of times wanted to plan how it would go, so i knew how to manipulate his retaliations to fit my planned answers. Then that way i knew i would again win the battle.

I started off with....... ME BOLD -HIM ITALLICS

Can we make this quick as im very busy as you well know
But you asked me to come and see you
Yes yes, enough with the little details, i believe an apology is in order
About time too, Its better we can be friends still
Well im waiting then! when your ready
huh? you want me to appologise? but.................
Fine, if you cant be big enough to accept when your wrong,
But i.........
No buts and will you stop interupting me, i thought we had progressed past this point of rows
but your the one who started it
Thats because you gave me reason to, why do you always make me feel like this
feel like what?
Like im not good enough, now look what you reduced me too *SOBS
Oh come here, i didnt mean to make you feel like that, im sorry.
Huh, so you admit your sorry which means your wrong, well i shall accept your appologies now please, stop harrassing me, i have a very busy life to lead.
But i wasnt saying sorry for cheating,
oh so now you admit you cheated you, you, you bastard.
But i didnt, thats what u accused me of.
Yes and you admitted it, plain as day.
Ok, well when your rea...........
NO, Thats all.

Anyway, as im happily walking along i hear some sniggers from behind, there was a group of teenage annoyances traipsing along behind me, obviously finding my trauma and toiled argument funny, orhaps it was because i was just talking to myself.

Well, there was no way i was losing face, so i pretended that my ipod earphones were my handsfree for my phone and made a big show of disconecting them from my ears, so then they would assume on the phone in a very heated and important call to my ex.

And yes it worked (along with a bribe of some ciggerettes to forget my face)

so if you will insist on rowing with yourself, its probably better to do it indoors.